On FRUSTRATION, DISAPPOINTMENT and things that guess what? Don't always work.
- Chiara De Caroli
- Feb 8, 2020
- 2 min read
This is a picture I took last week after dance class. I couldn't go today for a series of piddly, upsetting reasons. Mostly, I have to get new pointe shoes because the ones I got just a month ago don't fit me anymore-wheter it was a wrong fitting, or my feet changing shape super fast, whatever the reason, they don't fit right.
I could take have taken the excruciating pain one more day (we all like to martyrize ourselves every now and then, let's admit it, it makes us feel "special"), but I just felt I wasn't improving, that I was the only stupid child in class not capable of doing what the other kids do -you know the feeling- and that was painstaking. That, I couldn't take.
And it will happen again, shoes or not shoes. Let's just face it.
The foggy, lingering feeling of frustration, of not getting anywhere, of goofy stupidity, of not liking myself, both the way I look and the person I am, is just alway waiting to pop up, so I decided to take a moment and just SAY IT.
The toxic need to always look perfectly happy is nothing new, but I feel the social media thing pushed it to a whole different level - and on top of that, we HAVE to have something to show every given day. And if we don't, we are nothing but dull, boring commoners.
As if anyone could be constantly striking, cool, interesting, busy changing the world and doing mirabilia 24/7.
I mean, c'mon.
So here I am, taking a breath, stepping back from my public persona and saying it.
I'm not always special. I even recycled an old picture today to say it.
There. And I suck at things. Like, not even that much that would make me special in a weird way. I suck at things in a very normal way (Lol).
And today I start fresh again.
Give yourself a break, people, before you break.
Love you all,
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